A guy walks into a bar and asks for a bottle of whiskey and a glass.

“Something wrong, pal?” asks the bartender.

“Ah, my wife’s pissed,” the guy says. “The other day was my birthday, and she got naked and told me I could do whatever I wanted with her.”

“Nice,” says the bartender. “So what’s the problem?”

“I sent her to her mother’s house.”

Jimmy Takajima
Honolulu